YOU WANT LIES WITH THAT?

Yep, just by asking, Hamas will renounce its evil ways and say "Welcome" to Israel.
Yep, by continuing to pile men up on a heap of casualties, we'll honor the mission in Iraq
Yep, by calling the opposition naysayers we will promote unity
Yep, by making tax cuts permanent we'll make the economy roar
Yep, by appointing radical reactionary justices we'll prevent legislation from the bench
Yep, by claiming that crime, abortion and teen pregancies are all declining, we'll make it true.


Yep, and by removing any amount of dissidence - including one 40 something Mom of a dead soldier, we'll promote freedeom. Hauling Cindy Sheehan out of the House Chamber - as she sat there, a ticketed guest of a California Congresswoman, is a sign that this Administration can't weather criticism of any kind. Pathetic.

WHY "THE RUDE PUNDIT" RESONATES


Please turn off NASCAR ON FOX and pay attention America, even for a day or so!!!

Foul? Sure, frequently, hence the Moniker. Over the top? Yes, occasionally, but that's part of the schtick, and by the way so is "joking" about rat poisoning a Supreme Court Justice. The difference is (M)Ann Coulter gets ink ink ink for her "humor" and few outside of the left blogosphere know of the Rude One, or what s/he writes.

Yesterday's entry was bulls eye on why Alito is a bad pick for reasons not directly related to Mr. prim and proper normal Beaver Cleaver upbringing. Read the whole thing by clicking on the link to the right on the LOST home page.

Then here's a brief list of reasons to filibuster Alito that have nothing to do with Savage Sammy:
- Because President Bush authorizes spying on Americans without a warrant.
- Because President Bush authorized torture by Americans and through renditioning.
- Because President Bush detains people without charge for an indefinite period.
- Because President Bush ignores whatever laws he wants, even if he signs them.
- Because President Bush lied about Iraq to get us into the war.
- Because the Army is stretched "to the breaking point."
- Because the reconstruction of Iraq is being fucked up, too.
- Because President Bush refuses to acknowledge what it's gonna take to help the people of the Gulf Coast.
- Because Ford is getting rid of 30,000 employees.
- Because Karl Rove still has a job.
- Because President Bush and the Republicans fail to fully fund the bullshit "No Child Left Behind" program.
- Because President Bush denies the existence of global warming.
- Because the Medicare prescription drug program is a clusterfuck that will end up in people dying because of its existence.
- Because President Bush denies any connection to Jack Abramoff.
- Because President Bush refuses to speak before any audience that doesn't adore him.
- Because Dick Cheney exists.
- Because Osama Bin Laden is either living free or died free.
- Because Donald Rumsfeld still has a job.
- Because the White House has stymied every investigation into its fuck-ups.
- Because President Bush calls spying "terrorist surveillance" and pollution "Clean Skies" and money to churches "Faith-Based Initiatives."
- Because Richard Scaife doesn't need another tax cut.
- Because there has to be a line in the sand, somewhere; otherwise, it's just one long desert until who-knows-when.

FEAR AND STUPIDITY

Gore Vidal's latest article on how we got where we are is most insightful. The whole thing can be read at www.truthdig.com/dig/page2/20060124_president_jonah/ , but here's just a taste:

"Meanwhile, the indoctrination of the people merrily continues. “In a ‘State of the First Amendment Survey’ conducted by the University of Connecticut in 2003, 34 percent of Americans polled said the First Amendment ‘goes too far’; 46 percent said there was too much freedom of the press; 28 percent felt that newspapers should not be able to publish articles without prior approval of the government; 31 percent wanted public protest of a war to be outlawed during that war; and 50 percent thought the government should have the right to infringe on the religious freedom of ‘certain religious groups’ in the name of the war on terror.”

Imagine that. Too much freedom. Fox News and Limbaugh and the browbeating of the public schools by the right (coupled with the flight from the public schools by the affluent sectors of our society) can be blamed for a nation where 45 percent of adults think our Press is too free, or where three in ten believe that the press needs government approval for what it publishes, or that dissenters should be jailed, or that religious freedom yields to the War on Terror. Does that include the Quakers, who protested the war in Iraq? Does that apply to the Episcopalians, especially librul ones like All Saints Epispocal in Pasadena, under IRS investigation for urging its congregation to Vote Peace in 2004?

MOLLY IN LIVING COLOR

By popular demand - particularly in response to the request of me two favorite near teen twins, "HEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRRE'S MOLLY!!!!!!!!!!



If this blog were more popular, LOST'D be charging Costco a Product Placement fee for these pix

RABBIT SEASON! DUCK SEASON! LIB'RUL SEASON!


Believe it folks. When an empty headed blowhard like Chris Mathews equates bin Laden's "latest" tape with Michael Moore, when Bill I-don't-have-any-no-I-don't-remember-any-no-I-don't-know-that-I-have-any-HCA-Stock-now-let-me-go-back-to-video-diagnosing-comatose-people Frist smugly proclaims Samuel Alito the "Liberals worst nightmare, when a cadre of useful media idiots swing into synchro-babble while being directed by the hateful Dick on why warrantless spying on people is a big boon to us all, when a 23 year old paranoiac like Andrew Jones proudly goes public with his innocuous sounding organization "Bruin Alumni" which is enticing UCLA students to track and report on so-called radical professors, and when the Democratic party leadership except for a small committed few (Conyers, Dean, Gore, and sometimes Boxer) lower their heads and grab their ankles, you can tell its election season. Grow some spines! Drop some 'nads, people!

Where are the gutsy Democrats? Where are the people willing to stand up and fight? The people willing to harangue against the creeping Orwellianism that the GOP has become in this country? Spying on people without having to get an easily obtainable warrant is wrong - all the time - no exceptions. Saying that the President merely has to say a few words at a bill signing ceremony and this exempts him from following the law is wrong - all the time - no exceptions. Trying to haze people with contrary opinions out of academia is wrong - all the time - no exceptions. Why does "conservatism" wilt so readily when confronted by contrary viewpoints? Such debate ought to make someone's beliefs stronger, by forcing one to critically analyze and evaluate. That, apparently is "hard work," though, I suppose, Particularly when there is so much brush to clear at the Ranch.

Crediting this administration with "tough effectiveness" in the war on terror because "its no coincidence that we haven't been hit again" is wrong - completely - no exceptions. If they get credit for "keeping us from a second 9/11, don't they also get the blame for leaving bin Laden on the loose? Al-Zawahiri? Don't they get scarred for all the truthless hype we were confidently fed about Iraq? We're bubbling under the the mark of dead civilians from 9/11 in the Iraqi misadventure - another year like the last one and there'll be just as many dead GIs as there were fatalities in New York and D.C. that awful day, not to mention the thousands of other casualties. Not to mention the hundreds of billions spent on the Iraq debacle - into which we were misled by these malingnant humans, and not to mention the fact that we're now staring at Iran - expanding its nuclear efforts, and our military has been stretched and worn in Iraq. The marriage of incompetence and arrogance by this bunch is unparalleled. But it goes unchecked by the failure of the majority of Democrats to stand up and loudly label it for the bullsh*t that it all is.

AN OLD LAW SCHOOL ADMONITION REVISITED

From that first trial tactics/lawyering skills/ whatever they called it class at your institution, Lawyers are taught Never ask a question for which you don't know the answer. This is particularly true in the South, and where candor can take on a life of its own.

In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand.

He approached her and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know me?"

She responded, "Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams I've known you since you were a young boy, and frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you never will amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you."

The lawyer was stunned! Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?"

She again replied, "Why, yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can't build a normal relationship with anyone and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him."

The defense attorney almost died.


The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench, and in a very quiet voice, said, "If either of you bastards asks her if she knows me, I'll throw your sorry asses in jail!"

Earth's Limited Supply of Metals Raises Concern

As reported by Yahoo News this morning.

Fri Jan 20, 10:00 AM ET



If all nations were to use the same services enjoyed in developed nations, even the full extraction of metals from the Earth's crust and extensive recycling may not be enough to meet metal demands in the future, according to a new study.

To investigate the environmental and social consequences of metal depletion, researchers looked at metal stocks thought to exist in the Earth, metal in use by people today, and how much is lost in landfills.

Using copper stocks in North America as a starting point, the researchers tracked the evolution of copper mining, use and loss during the 20th century. They then combined this information with other data to estimate what the global demand for copper and other metals would be if all nations were fully developed and using modern technologies.

According to the study, all of the copper in ore, plus all of the copper currently in use, would be required to bring the world to the level of the developed nations for power transmission, construction and other services and products that depend on the metal.

The study, led by Thomas Graedel of Yale University, was detailed in the Jan. 17 issue of the journal for the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences.

For the entire globe, the researchers estimate that 26 percent of extractable copper in the Earth's crust is now lost in non-recycled wastes. For zinc, that number is 19 percent.

These metals are not at risk of immediate depletion, however, because supplies are still large enough to meet demands and mines have become more efficient at extracting these ores.

But scarce metals, such as platinum, face depletion risks this century because of the lack of suitable substitutes in such devices as catalytic converters and hydrogen fuel cells.

The researchers also found that for many metals, the average rate of usage per person continues to rise. As a result, the report says, even the more plentiful metals may face similar depletion risks in the future.

Yep, lets just keep throwin' crap Away, 'cause that's the 'Mercan Way, now, ain't it?

BUSH IS A SAINT??

President Bush was scheduled to worship at a small Methodist Church outside Washington, D.C. as part of his campaign to reverse his
rapidly-deteriorating approval rating among American voters. A week
before the visit, Karl Rove visited the Methodist Bishop who was
scheduled to preach on the chosen Sunday.

"As you know, Bishop," began Rove, "we've been getting a lot of bad
publicity among Methodists because of the president's position on stem
cell research and the like. We'd gladly make a contribution of $100,000
to the church if during your sermon you would say that President Bush is
a saint."

The Bishop thought about it for a few minutes, and finally said, "This
parish is in rather desperate need of funds ...

I agree to do it."

The following Sunday, Bush pompously showed up for the photo op, looking
especially smug. After making a few announcements, the Bishop begins
his homily:

"George W. Bush is a petty, self-absorbed hypocrite and a nitwit. He
is a liar, a cheat, and a low-intelligence weasel. He has lied about
his military record and had the gall to put himself in a jet plane
landing on a carrier posing before a banner stating "Mission
Accomplished." He invaded a sovereign country for oil and money,
turning it into a training ground for terrorists who would destroy our
country. He continues to confuse the American people by insisting on a
nonexistent connection between the horrors of 9/11 and the reason he
started his war in Iraq. He is the worst example of a Methodist I have
ever personally known.


"But compared to Dick Cheney and the rest of the Cabinet, George W. Bush
is a saint."


Hope the Right Rev' got the cashier's check up front - from somebody other than ABRAMOFF!!!!!!!!!!!!

YEAH, IT AIN'T FOOTBALL BUT Y'ALL STILL SUC ON THE HARDWOOD

And get the Hell out of Westwood, you pretenders!!!





UCLA 66
SUC 45

2008'S ANSWER TO HARRIET MIERS???




The Republicans are seriously going to run this sycophant, this lisping. faux-Black woman as their candidate in 2008? Well, bastions of the Right like Dick Morris seem to think so. Then again, Dick probably is hoping to get in some hot toe-sucking action with the Secretary soon. Geez, Dick, you may not be her type.

Rice (LOST refuses to call her "DOCTOR") made her academic claim to fame studying the Soviet Union, an entity extinct everywhere except in the fevered mind of Vladimir Putin. In fairness, Putin's probably not been the same since he let Bush "get a glimpse of his soul." Making Rice Secretary of State made about as much sense as Ford hiring the designer of the Chevy Vega as Director of Engineering. Wait, that's probably happened recently. Making this woman President, leader of the free world when her most consistent behavior since completing grad school has been kissing the asses of men named Bush (Please, no editorial comments about the poly-redundancy in the preceding sentence) is a scornfully ridiculous idea, unless of course the country is really being run by a consortium of Halliburton, Lockheed Martin and Diebold. Yep, I know, it proably already is, so we should all start saying "Hail Condi" right?

GAWD I Miss Nixon!

LOST'S NEW BLONDE DOG


Well, let's see, its been 9 days since the 9 month old puppy named Molly joined the old household. So far she's eaten a sock ($183.00 vet bill), swallowed a screw, and attacked the sprinkler line in one planter four (- count 'em four) times. She also ate a hole in a 20 year old throw pillow that LOST'S sister gave us as a Christmas gift right after we were married.

But, she's also figured out where her spot in the family room is, she already knew how to sit, and where to pee and poop (outside, phew), and yep, she's made two not so little boys very very happy - even if they wind up splitting the vet's bill. After all, the sock that she ate belonged to one of them, and LOST politely declined the Vet's suggestion that I bring it home and let the guilty party wear it for a day or so.

If only there was a way to siphon off some of that energy and market it, retirement would surely be at hand.

WYOMING'S OWN BAGDHAD BLOB IS AT IT AGAIN






From the hardly "librul" US News and World Report web site 1/14/06

Neither Cheney nor President Bush plans to make that mistake [not campaigning agressively for the war ] again ( AGAIN? WHAT THE HELL DOES THAT MEAN? AS IN, . . . maybe IRAN?) . In an interview with U.S. News, Cheney said, "You do have to keep a sustained campaign going. There's no question about it. Last fall, obviously, there were a lot of other items on the agenda. We went through the whole exercise with Katrina and the hurricanes and disaster relief and so forth that was, I suppose, a bit of a distraction (Yeah, DICK, the worst natural disaster in recent U.S. History in which thousands were killed, and thousands - especially a lot of dark skinned poor people lost everything, but that's a D-I-S-T-R-A-C-T-I-O-N in your mind.) But it is important to try to maintain public support for what we're doing out there."

On the road stumping for the administration's Iraq policy, the veep says he gets a good reaction almost wherever he goes. "I find when I get out around the country and talk with people about it, that most of the ones I interact with are very understanding and very supportive(Gee, I'm just guessing here, but could that have something to do with hand-picking the audiences, or only speaking in front of the local chapters of the "Heritage Foundation" and the "Council on Foreign Relations?". Nahh, probably just a coincidence ) That doesn't mean, obviously, that everybody agrees with the policy. Clearly, there are a number of folks who don't Yeah, DICK, we number in the high 50's to low 60s as a percentage. . But I think if they have time to think about it ( if we could just get 'em all to watch Fox News) , presented with the question, 'Do you think we ought to immediately withdraw from Iraq?' I think the vast majority of Americans would say no. ( that's what these shameless jerks always do, skew the debate to cast opposition as an absurdity. No one's saying send over the planes right now and evacuate, and you know that, you soulless, unfeeling bastard )"



But Cheney–apparently hoping to lower voter expectations in advance of the midterm elections in November–is warning that there are big challenges ahead in Iraq.

Two thousand six "is sort of the test now in terms of what the Iraqis can put together," Cheney said. "They're in the midst of negotiating on what the new government is going to look like, but they've got to be able to put together an effective government, a government that obviously takes into account the needs and wishes and desires of the broad diversity that we find in Iraq( but about which I couldn't give a tinker's damn here at home), but also one that's capable of taking these forces we're training, the security forces, and using them effectively to defeat the al Qaeda that are there." ( Gee, DICK, those would be the Al-Qaeda that our military presence there attracted, right? Since you know so much about what they're doing and what they need to accomplish, DICK, how's bout you putting in a months long stint over there to help 'em set things right? The Iraqis would probably benefit from such an omniscent American presence in their midst 24/7. Yeah, I know, you have 'other priorities')

Still, Cheney believes 2005 will be seen as "a watershed."

"The Iraqis met every single political milestone–elections in January, wrote a constitution in August, ratified it in October, new national elections in December. I think when we look back 10 years from now that '05 will have been a seminal year, if you will, to the development of democracy in Iraq." ( Kinda like the "last throes, if you will, of the insurgency," too, eh DICK? )

HAVE A YABBA DABBA DO TIME



Twice over the Holidays, Mrs. LOST and I left our morning-controlled slugfest that is our workout routine, and traveled to the local purveyor of overpriced coffee (ticker symbol: SBUX), only to encounter a living, breathing caricature of a human. A Pickup driving, ball-cap and wool shirt wearing, flesh and blood copy of Fred Flintstone, waddling up ahead of us in line at the coffee stop, as he waits for his heavily sugared, heavily flavored, whipped cream frou frou delight of the day. Now, “Fred’s” pickup is adorned with its own W ‘O4 sticker, and a 700 Club sponsored sticker “defending” marriage. Both times I have stifled the urge to blurt out to this good ol’ boy, "Hey, pard, for a guy that hates homos so much, you sure do drink a faggy coffee, dontcha think?” Mrs. LOST is extremely grateful for my restraint, despite the fact that she was the one who first noticed Fred, and didn’t call him to my attention in the most charitable way.

But old Fred is typical around these parts, no doubt more so than the Mrs. And I are typical. Fred’s a supporter of the current regime, probably listens to O’Reilly, Hannity, Limbaugh during the day, and Fox at night. In Fred’s world we’re winning the war on terror, and every soldier’s death simply, reflexively reaffirms Fred’s mantra that “Freedom isn’t free.” Fred either believes that there were Weapons of Mass Destruction in Iraq, or doesn’t care that none were found, because Bush and Dick have told him over and over that Saddam was a bad guy and had to be removed. Fred’s never heard, and wouldn’t believe it if told now, that Cheney said in ’92 that going into Iraq and removing Hussein was not worth “that damn many” American lives. Fred’s sure that Saddam “did” the 9/11 attack, as he’s heard 9/11 and Iraq uttered in the same sentence so many times by now that it simply must be true. George says it; Fred believes it, that settles it.

Fred must have a job, since he’s up at that hour of the morning and drinking 5 dollars worth of heated sugar water every day, so for him the economy is just fine. I suspect Fred’s married, but I wouldn’t wish him on any unseen Wilma at this point. Unless Fred is well insured. Fred is probably in possession of a personal Savior, one who in Fred’s mind cares most about Abortion and whether Bob and Clarence want to get married than He does about how many people within a 5-mile radius of Fred woke up hungry, or ill, or frightened, or in despair this morning. Fred buys American, or at least he thinks he does. That’s why it says “Ford” on that nameplate, doggone it. Fred shops at Wal-Mart, if his clothes are any indicator, so don’t let the F-150 fool you into thinking he’s a Union guy.

Fred’s heard of Tom DeLay, but anything De Lay did is nowhere close to the evils committed by Clinton. Fred’s confident of this because Rush has explained it all. Fred doesn’t know or care if Rush eats Oxycontin like candy. That’s another lib’rul slur. Fred’s probably heard that our Congressman just pled guilty and resigned. But Fred knows that they all do what Duke did, and that Duke just got caught, and that because Duke was a Top Gun war hero he must’ve had a really good reason. Fred hasn’t settled on a replacement favorite for Duke though. He’s waiting for his local talk show to feed that information to him.

Judging by his size, Fred’s a candidate for Type II Diabetes, hypertension, stroke, and coronary artery disease. None of that matters to Fred, because as 700 Club Leader Pat Robertson has said, the end, and the rapture are near, and Fred’s on that destiny train for sure.

LOST doesn’t think Fred can be freed from the prison of his own vicarious reality. But, what about Fred’s children, or his siblings, or anyone else within or adjacent to his circle? That’s the challenge for the upcoming year. The Dems must take the fight on the meaningful issues of our time – fighting against poverty, unemployment, the exportation of jobs, endless war, and bigotry - to Fred’s world, and not be afraid to articulate them in language that will be both understandable, and couched in moral terms.
It’s worth the effort. And Fred, if you’re reading this, its’ like that old truckers’ saying goes: “If you wanted a cup of cream and sugar, why dintcha ask for it?”

THIS BOOK OF DANIEL IS FARCICAL




Okay, okay, so Mrs. LOST and I watch very little television together. Save for the Daily Show and the occasional college football game, it’s a rare event, as Mrs. LOST hates to sit still for any length of time – clearly not the time necessary to watch an hour long TV show – let alone a 2 hour debut. This is true despite her one time fixations with ER and West Wing, but I digress.

Last evening we nestled in to watch NBC’s heavily promoted “Book of Daniel,” built around an Anglican priest named Daniel Webster (yes, he’s a descendant we’re told) struggling to hold a parish together, deal with sectarian politics (Daddy’s a Bishop), and lead a family which would make the Bundys seem almost Cleaveresque. One son is a quietly (Bishop grandpa doesn’t know) but un-closeted gay aspiring med student, another adopted son (replacing a predeceased natural child?) is an Asian Austin Powers, shagging nightly, and the daughter – as we are told from the beginning scenes, sells mail order dope to support her Japanese comic strip avocation. Oh, and Mom never goes anywhere without her galvanized metal cocktail shaker. Sounds pretty normal so far, right?

Did I mention that Father Daniel eats Vicodin like some kids eat M & M’s, and he talks to Jesus, who will apparently have an ongoing cameo role until next month’s cancellation. It isn’t like this 21st century “Soap” with a Roman collar is more offensive than South Park’s recent over the top attempt to stroke out William O. Donohue (the Archie Bunker sound-a-like who heads the “Catholic Leaque” – he’s enough to make a normal Catholic want to declare Free Agency to be picked up by the Presbyterians); Its that the show is simply too full of glib banter by a cast chock full of flawed frauds that it can’t even be called campy. It needs that missing “r.”

Take the opening episode. After the late night trip to the precinct, we find Father Daniel dealing with the apparent embezzlement of 3 million dollars in school building funds by his sister-in-law’s husband, who later turns up dead. This occurs not before we find the good Father touching base with his Catholic counterpart – played unconvincingly by Nick Tortelli, and asking Father “Nick” to ask his “associates” – in the mob – to investigate the disappearance. Just when a beleagured Catholic like LOST is thinking “oh, finally, a TV show that points out that other denominations have some shortcomings, too,” NBC plumbs that old Catholic-coppo connection, with a most predictable outcome.

Along the way we’re introduced also to some well-heeled, uber-obnoxious bigoted parish front-bencher types, well played by recognizable faces, and a younger Bishop played by Ellen Burstyn. Her role seems geared toward making one think that Vicodin abuse is a quaint ritual among the clergy. All this tied together with a scene closure schtick borrowed from “Wild Wild West.” Oddly enough, the latter winds up more plausible than “Book” simply because Daniel’s extended brood is just too strange to make it all work. Even a joke-cracking Jesus can’t save this one.

Perhaps the germ of truth embedded in this gobbler is that there is no such thing as a "normal family," and to the extent that we all could use a reminder of that now and again (be it for reassurance purposes or for a dose of humility), that message is not without value.Still, the show's effort to drive that point home is about as subtle as a marching band in a mortuary. But don’t take LOST’S word for it. Tune in some Friday this month and decide for yourself. Just don’t wait too long. This one’s headed for Limbo in a matter of weeks, and don’t look for Bill Frist or Henry Hyde to legislate installation of the show’s feeding tube.

NEVER BET ON HUBRIS




Yes, Pride goeth before the fall, so say the wizened. For weeks the press has presented hype-a-licious articles about how many Trojans would be leaving school early to get NFL riches, or who was most Hollywood-like, or who rubbed elbows with whom, as if to say "all we gotta do is show up, and we'll beat those bumpkins from Austin."

As it played out, Texas was as fast a team as the Trojans had seen all year. None of the big play offensive types made anything really spectacular happen - no real big play heroics for TDs. Yes, the Trojans scored 38 points, but none of them came easy. And Reggie looked very very average in this game. Yes, this Bruin fan still wants him outta town by April, no doubt, but he ain't going into the NFL as the Second coming of Walter Payton or Barry Sanders. He's not even LaDanian Tomlinson.

Yeah, LOST shouldn't have bet 20 bucks on $C and given the points. Yep, LOST wishes the Bruins coulda done this. Karl, take notes. The "hurry up" offense kept these guys on their heels. You need to recruit good footspeed - especially on defense. Remember this stuff for next November/December, okay. But also, it was well worth 20 bucks to watch these guys fall off their stupid horse. The only thing that could possibly make LOST happier would be finding Pete Carroll's number in Jack Abramoff's rolodex. Hey, it could happen.

Or, in the immortal words of this guy, "HA, HAH"

MAKE THAT EIGHT YEARS OF POST-SEASON FUTILITY





Well, Dad, if you can somehow read this, then you're well aware of the ongoing futility that is Notre Dame Bowl football.

I've joked morbidly over the last couple of years that I'm glad you didn't live to see the erupting scandal in the 'hood, because it would've killed you. Eight bowl losses in a row would have just P****ed you off.

The only positive to come out of this latest one is that it gives this Bruin hope that the upcoming season's trip from Westwood to South Bend isn't doomed, by any stretch of the imagination.

BEFORE I FORGET, GOOD JOB COACH!





But don't forget that this kind of bath is what killed George Allen.

Seriously, let's get some student athletes who can hit. And maybe a defensive coordinator who can coach.

CLOSE THE LID!! OPEN THE NEW BOX




Perhaps the most telling things about American society out of whack center around the Holidays. The haves and have mores consume like drunken sailors on Pearl Harbor layovers. The wreckage strewn Christmas tree lots on the 26th, still sporting in some cases dozens of unsold trees, and the obligatory post Christmas trash day spectacular- when neighbor upon neighbor lines up 3, 4 or 5 loads of boxes and paper and bottles and cans full of throwaways. To some very small degree this can be seen in the neighborhoods of the less fortunate, but nowhere is it more apparent than in the affluent avenues of this little burgh - and places like it to be sure. "Abundance rejoices," indeed.

Still, as the year draws to a close, and the sun sinks in the West along with GWB's poll numbers - hell, even our local TV news broadcast a story that "Brownie You're Doing a heckuva job," was the Bush Utterance of the year - a short list of fond hopes for 2006.]

For LOST's immediate fam: perspective where it is needed, compassion where it is lacking, understanding where it has been absent, strength where weakness has held forth, perseverance in place of pessimissim, contrition to supplant complacency, and forgiveness were anger has held sway.

For the local community: an awakening of critical thought and analysis as this District chooses the heir to the Duke-Stir. For compassion in dealing with the plight of the powerless and poverty stricken in our own locality.

For this State: Increased emphasis on education, the revamping of infrastructure, and the responsible stewardship of the environment, especially the coastal areas, and waterways

For Dick Cheney: a wiling donor for a real soul and a compassionate heart. Failing that, for some measure of restraint in expressing falsehoods. Failing that, a trip down Agnew memory lane.

For Mike Brown, former head of FEMA, a years long stint in the Peace Corps, preferably in the most backward of third world nations.

For Patrick Fitzgerald, the smoking guns necessary to remove Karl Rove from his malignant pursuit of greater power and influence.

For Karl Dorrell, some HIgh School seniors who can get great grades, and who L-O-V-E to hit and tackle ballcarriers

For Pete Carroll: an unprecedented offer-you-can't-refuse from the San Francisco 49ers;

For Pope Benedict XIV, a big box full of humility, to be freely shared with the College of Cardinals

For Congressional Democrats, spines, spines spines!!!!!!!

For Bill O'Reilly, Michael Savage Weiner and Ann Coulter: chronic laryngitis

For Rush Limbaugh: inpatient, orange-jumpsuited drug rehabilitation - - in Leavenworth